Thursday, April 29, 2010

Things Kids Say Thursday :Video Edition

So since I'm not feeling well I decided to let the kids take over. So it's really a Things Kids Do Thursday but whatever, let's not quibble with semantics.

After watching this, the 6 year old said, take that red guy out, he's ruining the video! Personally I thought he had hardly any time on camera so gave him an opportunity to star in his own video.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

What the Hell am I Doing Sick?

Want to know what really sucks? Being pregnant and unable to take anything! My throat hurts, my nose is stuffy, I'm sneezing and coughing... I have been informed that I can take Tylenol if a fever develops. That's soooo not helpful. Now why is it when I am so tired, my body is physically exhausted, I can't sleep? WTH? Doesn't it realize if I got some sleep, I just might feel better? I decided its the weather's fault. First its nice and warm and sunny, then its cold and rainy, then its rainy and warm, then cold and sunny and supposedly tomorrow, hot and sunny again. If the weather was a person, it would be a multiple personality.

Well that's my complaint for the day, I'm too tired to think of anything else. For more creative posts, see the Blue Monkey Butt sisters.

Monday, April 26, 2010

It's the Monday Minute, 4/26

So I decided to join Ian's Monday Minute this week. If you don't already know about it feel free to check it out.

Monday Minute

So now's your chance to find out some completely random stuff about me via Ian's questions.

1. What drugs have you done in your life?

Oh the usual, Tylenol, Advil and the occasional Vicoden.

2. A/S/L

Can I just tell you that I had to have that translated for me. Google informs me that it means Age/Sex/Location. The fact that I had to look it up tells you all you need to know about my age. If I tell you anymore, I'd have to put a hit out on you. As for my sex I'm a girl. Have you noticed all the pink around here? Unless you wanted a yes/no answer in which case yes I have some. Case in point, baby now currently residing in tummy. My location is Union County, NJ which for those not in the know is the North East section of Jersey.

3. Do you pick your nose?

No, God picked mine out and I'm happy with it.

4.What's your favorite childhood cartoon?

This question assumes that as a child I watched cartoons enough to have a favorite. Not so much true.

5. List the URL of the best blog post you've ever done.

What? This one doesn't count? I like to think of myself as a great wine that just gets better with time. So today's is the best followed by yesterday's followed by the day before. It just makes sense. Doesn't it?

Friday, April 23, 2010

Choices, choices

The six year old has been doing much much better with his spelling. This is because I have been drilling the words over and over into his head on the Thursday night before his test and also Friday morning on the way to school. This has resulted in three perfect scores in a row. Woohoo!!!!!

This week he steadfastly refused. He was whining, crying, deliberately misspelling words. (Generally being a pain in my rear.) So I gave him a choice. He could be punished all day Friday, Saturday and Sunday (No TV, no computer, no DS) or he could work on his spelling. Guess what he chose? That's right, the fun fun punishment!

It's gonna be a long weekend....

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Dear Husband

Dear Hubby,

Lately you have been frustrated with my laziness. I'm sorry. Here's the thing though. Those two hours when the boys are in school are my only time when absolutely no one wants anything from me. (except for you who obviously want me to be slaving in the house at that time.) So it is hard for me to give up my peace and quiet/computer time and do mundane chores like laundry and mopping.

Good news though. In two months, the baby will be born and both boys will be out of school so I will have no peace, no quiet and no free time and so no reason not to do the chores. Hold on until then, okay?

Love you,
Your wife not your slave

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Post It Note Tuesday House Hunter Edition

We have been trying to find a bigger house to live in since I don't want to share a room with baby girl forever. (9 months in utero is enough, really) Here's some post it notes to let you know how our search has been going.

Here's hoping the next one is better. Wish us luck.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Four going on Sixteen?

So it was a quiet Sunday morning. We had just finished our breakfast of pancakes and sausage. My husband and I were downstairs reading the morning paper while the boys were upstairs playing. Or so I thought. Now I realize I should have been more suspicious of the quiet and utter lack of banging and yelling. Anyway the four year old comes downstairs holding his chin which is bleeding with both hands. There is blood all over his hands as well. Questioning the six year old was no help. Apparently he was absorbed on the computer and saw nothing. Or so he claims... Finally, the four year old confessed. He was in our bathroom and decided to give shaving a try. Just took daddy's razor and cut the skin right off his chin. I'm just amazed he wasn't hysterical crying. He went around the rest of the day with a Diego bandage on his chin. Personally, I think he was proud of himself. I told my husband he better keep his blades on a higher shelf from here on out.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Things Kids Say Thursday #6

4 year old: Can I have a snack?
Me: You just had a snack. How many snacks do you need?
4 year old: 2
6 year old: 3 hundred, 5 thousand and 10.

4 year old: Do you want to have a vacation in Paradise? Cause it looks nice there.
Me: Yes. (Who doesn't?)

4 year old: Oh! Great piles of catfish! (I think he heard this on Veggie Tales and was just waiting for the right opportunity to use it.)

4 year old's teacher: Oh are you Prince Charming? (He was wearing a shirt which had a frog with a crown on it.) He looks at her with a puzzled face.

Teacher: What happens when you kiss the frog? He turns into a prince!

4 year old: This is just a shirt.

4 year old:If I eat a lot of food, I'll get a big tummy with a baby in it, right mom?

4 year old: I love you.

Me: I love you too. (Kisses me.)

4 year old: Do my kisses make you happy?

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

I'm Baaaaack!

Now don't tell me. You didn't even notice I was gone. That's so sad.

The kids were off all last week on Easter break and so rather than stick around the house and let them drive me nuts, I planned lots of excursions. We had picnics in the park, kite flying, a hike in the woods (seven months pregnant, one hour hike, 95 degree temperatures, guess how that went), a barbecue and went to a show. We also started soccer season last week. The worst part about this is the boys are on different teams which play the same day in different fields. (And, as was the case on Saturday, at the same time.) Since I haven't mastered bilocation yet, I was forced to rely on family members to stay with the six year old while I took the four year old to his game. Luckily this week one has a game at 9 am while the other isn't until 11:30 so it will give me plenty of time to go from one to the other. (Of course this also means I can say goodbye to leisurely Saturday mornings for the time being.)

Now back to your regularly scheduled program....

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Letters on Facebook, Part III

So if you've ever had a birthday on facebook, you get a lot of birthday wishes even from relatives whom you haven't seen in years. Is there anything more boring than a whole page of Happy Birthday, happy birthday, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Happy Birthday over and over and over? My stepsons had a birthday a couple of weeks ago, they're twins. So most people (poor unoriginal saps) sent the same message to both. For instance, Happy Birthday to my handsome nephew, have a great day! (twice, as if they were the same person or something) I, of course not being either boring or unoriginal chose to put this.

Dear Joshua,

Since I've noticed all your political statuses lately For some reason, he was in favor of the health care bill and was posting about it nonstop, I thought you might be interested to know that you share a birthday with Al Gore. Personally, I think he's a tree hugger and a sore loser but then I don't have to share a birthday with him, do I? Don't worry, we don't have to get into it today, I know this whole liberal thing is a phase you young people go through. I, too, was a liberal for like three minutes in 1988. Then after I was hospitalized for a loss of blood, I got over it. Bleeding hearts aren't my thing. Anyway, happy birthday!

Love your evil stepmother,


and for the other...

Dear Joseph,

Happy Birthday! It's unfortunate that you have to spend it in that terrible place known as Miami. I still can't believe people live there, ON PURPOSE. I heard a rumor that it is going to be 80 and sunny out there today. I'm glad to hear you are getting a break from the constant hurricanes. Of course, as you already know, too much sunshine causes cancer, so enjoy your day outside today and then quickly hide inside with the shade and air conditioning....or move to NJ We hardly ever get hurricanes, floods maybe..., your choice.



So better than just happy birthday, right? It's the gift of laughter, your welcome.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Letters on Facebook, Part II

Some of you may have seen my post last week on the letters our family was writing on Facebook. If you didn't (because you were living under a rock or you suck) check it out here.

Anyway, my brother didn't send one to me. Instead when he got back, he decided to post the following to my other brother. To fully get this letter you have to know that David gets his kicks on Facebook by messing with his profile page. At the time of this post, he was a widower living in Cape May but formerly from Flatbush. He's also a surgeon who gives museum tours in his spare time while waiting to graduate from high school. (yeah none of this is true.)

Dear David,

Over the weekend the women decided to profess their love for one another Facebook style. They neglected to mention the men in their lives. We can't help it if you were lame and out of touch. Now since you and I know how we feel about each other (we're way too cool for public displays of sibling affection) I propose we profess our love of butt nekkid hoes, hood rats, fly honeys and old-fashioned prostitutes. And all this time I thought a ho was a ho was a ho. Obviously, I've lived a sheltered life. To do this, I think we need to take our space shuttle to go kayaking on the moon with some of Tiger Wood's leftovers Wait. He left some?, then pour out a little liquor for your dead wife in Flatbush and celebrate her life and times by visiting all the gentleman's establishments in the greater Cape May area. Yeah that's exactly what I want my husband to do when I'm gone. Right after he goes blind with grief. What say you?


Unfortunately David did not respond so I did instead.

Dear Little Brother, Yes, his status as nearly two years younger means that despite the fact that he is half a foot taller than me, he will always be little.

This is to warn you of heading to places without Internet service (like Massachusetts). Not only do you miss out on sending me letters for the cyber world's amusement but you are also reduced to semi attired women and booze for entertainment. Lucky for you it was cold and rainy this weekend or you would have also missed out on a rockin barbecue. You have been warned.


My favorite older sister, Despite the fact that I am his only older sister, I choose to take this as a compliment.

You know that feeling when you check the mailbox and you have a letter from a good friend you never hear from? If I never hear from them, why are they my friends? No? Me either. We're not THAT old. Got that right. But I've heard that it's a pretty good feeling. This must be almost like that, only completely different. Because let's face it, there's no feeling like getting a letter that you asked -nay, demanded- from someone. Hopefully this letter feels like that feeling you get from a friend who forgot your actual birthday but called you like a week later and said happy belated birthday. You mean friends in the hospital with amnesia? Cause that's the only acceptable excuse. You know that feeling? Again, not so much. Me either. Anyway for your next blog, if you could write to the writers of ALL reality TV, I would appreciate it because American Idol isn't the only reality show that sucks this year. (See Stars, Dancing with the and Apprentice, Celebrity) K Thanks. Bye.

Sometime after these posts and the corresponding 64 comments that followed mine (not even the record yet) my brother posted this status. J is getting ready to delete 6.3 million emails from facebook...thanks girls. To which I responded, Your welcome, of course.

Friday, April 2, 2010

April Fool's Pranks in Mexico

Yesterday the four year old had school and the six year old didn't. Excited about his day off of school, I told him that he would be going to school with the four year old. At first, he assumed I was joking but when we arrived at the school, he started to believe me. "I don't want to go to their school! It's for babies!" The four year old was concerned that the six year old didn't have a coat hook labeled with his name but I told him that no one would mind if he hung his jacket on an unlabeled hook. That's when the tears started. "No pleeeease Mom! I don't want to go to school!" Is it wrong that I found this to be hilariously funny? Anyway I let him know I was only April Fooling and we went on with our day. We went out for lunch with my sisters and brother about a half hour or so away from home and the six year old kept asking where we were going. Of course, since we were going to Baja's Mexican Grill, I told him we were going to Mexico for lunch. Despite the fact that he seemed like he didn't believe us and we told him he would know we arrived in Mexico when he saw the sombreros and the Mariachi band, he told my husband all about it when he got home. "Dad, we went to Mexico for lunch. They had a Taco Bell there and everything!"